Not Like the Rest of Them

I'm sure you all have had your Facebook feed overloaded with littles all dressed up in their cute back to school outfits - with or  without a sign exclaiming it was the first day of school, right?  I like to see these pictures, and for the third year, E took one herself.

This year, however, was a bit different.  Not only did we move five states away and attending a new school full of new people, but she was going to a "big girl" school - Kindergarten!  I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous - but you might be surprised as to why.

A week before school, the PTA hosted a playdate for all incoming kindergarteners.  As E was running around, I started talking to another Mom.  A few minutes in, she said "Isn't it crazy they are going to Kindergarten?  I'm not ready for her to grow up - she still needs me!".  I was a little taken back.  Sure, the thought of my girls growing older hurts a bit, but it doesn't make me sad! 

I am excited for her.  She is making new friends, learning new things, growing independent.  She is learning invaluable social skills - all things I could never teach her at home on my own.  She comes home excited about her day; filled with computer time, coloring, spelling, and of course, recess. 

So, while I witnessed a lot of moms crying while leaving the school Monday, I on the other hand, was smiling. 

Just a Mom

Major life changes are never an easy transition.  Getting engaged, having a baby, changing jobs, or moving, among so many others, always comes with a series of emotions.  Everyone deals differently, and not everyone will react the same way to these changes.  With our upcoming move to Dallas, we are inevitably facing a lot of new things.  By now, I have a good handle on my feelings towards this new life of ours, but I what I wasn't ready to encounter were other people's reactions.

When we (finally) get there, I won't be looking for a job.  That doesn't mean I won't ever work out of the home again, but we are fortunate enough to not have to rely on my income.  While telling coworkers and colleagues about our upcoming move, they of course want to know where I will be working in Dallas.  The shock, and yes, sometimes horror on some of their faces when I say I won't be working has been nothing less than offensive.

Why is it so wrong to be a stay at home mom?  Why shouldn't I be the sole caretaker of my children if we can afford to do so?  E and A are little, and are going through a huge change as well.  We both feel that if I am home it might help with the transition.  And really, isn't this what I have always wanted?

But even more...

Why do I feel like I have to defend myself?  As women, we should each be able to define ourselves.  And we should never be limited in those definitions.  I will never be "just a mom", no mother is.  I am a wife, a friend, a daughter, a professional, and so so much more.  We all are.

Throughout this whole crazy month, I have learned a lot about myself, and those around me.  But the number one lesson is that I can't control others reactions, but I can control how I react to them.  And to those negative reactions - being "just a mom" is the best job I've ever had, and I'm more than grateful for that label.

Linking up with Emily for Grateful Heart Monday.

To My Sweet A

My Lovely A,

Before I had babies, everyone used to tell me that "time flies by" with young children.  I always used to nod my head and say "it sure does!", all while thinking that I had all the time in the world with you.

Today is your second birthday.  And I can remember that day like it was yesterday.  You were ten days late, and I remember thinking how ready I was to meet you, even though you had no plans to grace us with your presence yet.  Looking back, I wish I would have enjoyed my pregnancy with you more and let you come on your own, as it was probably my last.  When you were born, my heart swelled to a level I didn't know was possible - the second you looked in to my eyes, I knew we were meant to be together.  

Since then, you have grown in to quite the toddler.  The love and admiration you have for your older sister is just amazing.  Everything she does or says, you do too (or at least try!).  You have a serious obsession with books and reading, and it amazes me how long you can sit and flip through a story - never lose that!  When you aren't busy "reading", you can have sort of a sass to you.  I'll let you in on a little something - I secretly love that sass - and you somehow know when to pair it with your sweetness that almost always gets your Daddy and I to do whatever it is you want.  I probably shouldn't admit that, but by the time you read this, you'll have figured that out on your own! 

This year brings a lot of huge changes for our family, none of which you will probably remember when you are older, but I know you will take them with a huge toothy smile on your face.  Always, always remember how much you are loved.  I promise to cherish every moment I have with you, because they were right - time is flying by.

Happy Second Birthday A!

Multiply by Ten

Life is really great at a few things - one of which is pulling me in a million directions, all at the same time.  It's completely reasonable that I be in three different places at the same time, wearing four different hats.  Right?  Wrong.  I can't do it all.  I try most days, but then on some days, I want to give up and just focus on a few of my responsibilities.  I need to have ten of myself. 

Mom Me needs to play with my children all day, teach them new skills, and mold them in to great people.  Real Me is able to get them dressed and fed, and is able to read a book or two throughout the day.

Career Me needs to work 40+ hours a week, make outstanding goals for myself (and meet them), and make everyone happy here.  Real Me gets my work done, but doesn't have much time for new projects.

Chef Me should cook great, nutritious breakfasts, lunches, dinners and snacks for my girls and husband.  Real Me is lucky to get the girls to eat fruit once a day (veggies do not go well), and we end up eating out 1-2 times a week, mostly because of showings and laziness.

Homemaker Me is getting the most attention these days.  Have you ever been in a house with a 5 and 2 year old?  Chaos.  It's up to me to keep it clean, picked up and tidy, because you never know when you'll get a showing request.  We have a cleaning lady once a month, but recently needed to step it up to every other week because I couldn't keep up.

Wife Me should take more care of my husband.  He's lucky if I ask how his day was, and this makes me sad.  He works hard for us and deserves more attention!  He also gets the brunt of my stress, and that's not fair.

Friend Me should be texting, emailing, visiting my girlfriends, just keeping in touch better.  I definitely feel like I haven't seen them as much, and that's partly on me.  They are the best friends, and understand my craziness lately, but I miss them!

Daughter Me needs to go home and visit my parents.  I haven't been there since Christmas!  That is unacceptable.  Thankfully, I have a wonderful family who understands everything that is going on right now.

Dog Mom Me (of course I couldn't leave out my buddy Charlie!).  He needs me too!  He gets so anxious in the car, and he has been having to leave a lot due to showings.  He needs me to cuddle more, walk him and play fetch more.  Real Me feeds him, lets him out and only cuddles while I sleep.

And, of course, let's not forget about Me.  I would love to take a bath, relax, read, craft, maybe go shopping.  Right now, all of these things feel selfish to me - it's hard to tell myself that "me time" is important.

I know I am not the first person to be busy, or stressed out by the million directions I feel I'm being pulled in.  How do you handle all of the hats you wear? Are there any really good tips for getting the most out of the few 24 hours we have each day?  I'm all ears - all 20 of them!

Five Candles

My Dearest "E",

Somehow, in some way, you turned five this week.  Every year on your birthday, your Daddy and I sit and reminisce about that day.  How I was in labor for 42 hours with you.  How you got a little impatient during those hours, but were so stubborn you wouldn't work with me.  How we stayed awake all night (the second night of labor) watching your heart rate on the monitor, and how scared we were each time it dropped.  And every year, we thank God that you were born healthy.

Last year, I marveled at the fact that you had become a big sister, and was amazed by your never-ending love for A.  I am still am amazed by that.  Sometimes, you are the only one that can calm her down, and in the morning you gladly jump in her crib and read stories together.  This past year, you have learned so much in pre-kindergarten.  You can write any word, just by sounding it out, and know so many sight words.  You read stories on your own, and are constantly asking Daddy and I about the world around you.

This year is special because in the fall you will be going to Kindergarten.  I can't wait to see your friendships grow, your knowledge and love for learning blossom, and the bond with A to deepen. 

I hope you never lose your love for life - and always know that we love you "a million kagillion".

Love, Mommy

Some of your favorites: Princesses, (still) My Little Pony, coloring and crafts, puppies and kittens, cake pops (only from Starbucks!), gymnastics, snap peas and chicken nuggets.





-Linking up with Emily for Grateful Heart Monday.

The Timing is Right

Sometimes, when we least expect it, the perfect moment can happen and change your entire perspective.  It doesn't happen often, and never happens when you think it will, but when it does, the message that comes through is exactly what your heart needs to hear.

We've had a lot going on the last couple of weeks.  It all started when A was in the hospital.  Just as we were getting on the other side of that, we unexpectedly put an offer on a house.  (We didn't get it, by the way.)  That little leap of faith prompted us to get our house ready for the market, and it is now for sale.  All of this in a matter of ten days, and to top it off, we leave for vacation this Saturday.

The trip to St. Thomas is coming at the perfect time.  All of the stress from A's sickness, de-cluttering and listing our house, and the last minute showings we've had have completely exhausted me.  I love the beach, I love one on one time with my husband, but I couldn't shake this underlying feeling of "mom guilt".  How could I leave my babies for a week?  Would they resent me?  Is it too much to ask my parents to watch them for that long?  I was borderline not excited to leave.

source

And then?  Our realtor came over to take pictures.  He brought his wife, who helps him with staging and lighting.  She and I were talking and she asked about our vacation.  I very casually said we were going for a week, without the kids, and in that moment, she said the perfect thing to me.

"The relationship between husband and wife is the strongest in the family.  Relationships with your parents will eventually fade, as will those with your children as they grow up and move out of your house.  People often don't focus on one another, and taking time for just each other is the best thing you can do for your family.  You shouldn't feel bad about making your husband a priority."

It's almost as if she sensed my mom guilt.  In that moment, I knew she was right - and realized that having my girls spend the week with their grandparents is amazing for everyone involved.  I can't feel guilty for spending the week with my husband - we so desperately need that time together.

The timing of her comment was impeccable, although I know it wasn't a coincidence.  My heart is happy and I am excited for vacation.  My heart is at peace knowing that my girls (and pup!) will be spending quality time with two sets of their grandparents.  Bring on the sunscreen, sand, and of course, cocktails!

My wish for you today is that no matter what is laying heavy on your heart, you listen for that perfect moment.  Wait for it, it will come.

Linking up with Anne.

When "Thank You" Isn't Enough

"Thank You."

It's a phrase that we all use, every day.  When?  Probably more than you think.

"Thank you" for calling.
"Thank you" for holding the door.
"Thank you" when receiving the lunch you ordered.
"Thank you" for pouring me a delicious glass of wine.

I never gave much thought to the phrase.  That is until this past weekend, when I literally said "thank you" for saving my daughter's life and making me comfortable while doing so.

It all started like any other weekend - my Blogger Love post went up, I played with the girls all day, and even did some laundry.  That night we had our friends over to discuss our upcoming vacation, and the girls went to bed like any other night.

My littlest, A, woke up around 2am and wouldn't go back to sleep.  She was coughing a bit and just all around cranky.  By 7am she was breathing quicker than normal, which warranted a trip to Urgent Care.  We were given a diagnosis of RSV and prescriptions for a nebulizer and treatments.

By 6pm, I counted 78 breaths per minute.  Seventy eight.  The average toddler takes 20-30 breaths per minute.  Somehow, I manged to not completely freak out, but instead bundled her up and rushed to the Emergency Room.

After waiting two hours and not seeing a doctor (more on that another time), we left and went to another hospital where she was taken in right away.  She was given three back to back nebulizer treatments, steroids and motrin for the fever.  She was then admitted.  The doctor apologized for having to admit her, and I said "Thank You", as I was terrified of taking her home for the night.  We are still dealing with it, but we are home.

We stayed overnight.  She had treatments every two hours.  I didn't sleep, she didn't sleep, but I was so relieved to have the amazing medical staff watching over her.  We were later told that her breathing rate was close to being very dangerous, and any longer we might not have had the outcome we did. 

How do you say "Thank You" to the Pediatric E.R. staff for getting in her right away?

To the Respatory Therapist that sat with us and explained everything?

To the E.R. Pediatrician that saw her within 5 minutes of getting there?

To the fantastic Pediatric nurses that were so caring and gentle with everything?

To the charity, Becca's LEGacy, who had a soft, cuddly bear ready for A to hold all night?

To the Ronald McDonald Family Room that gave A puzzles and books to keep her occupied, and provided me a warm shower with all    of the toiletries I needed?  You have no idea how much that helped me, mentally.

To my inlaws, who got a phone call that one granddaughter was going to the hospital and that the other was being dropped off?

To my fabulous friends and family that checked up on us and made sure that we were ok, at all hours of the night?

To God, who blessed our medical team and kept a loving hand over A?

Quite simply, "Thank You" doesn't begin to be enough.  My feeling of thanks goes beyond that.  Is there a phrase for that?  Much greater than "thank you"?  That's what I'm feeling.

Being in this situation was so scary, but when I think about all of the amazing things that happened during this ordeal, I can't help but to be grateful for good medical care, friends and family, and above all else, A's improving health.

Next time you say "thank you" to someone, I urge you to really think about what you are saying.  Be thankful for the amazing things in your life, and give thanks wherever you can.

Linking up with Emily for Grateful Heart Monday. (Tuesday?)

A Day of Yes

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 Back in July, I got an email inviting to pre-order tickets to Disney on Ice: Frozen.  E was (and still is) obsessed - isn't every child?  I purchased 10 tickets - my girlfriends and I were each going to take our oldest.  Time went by, I sort of forgot about it, then started seeing commercials and billboards all around Chicago for the upcoming show.  I hadn't told E about it yet, so I decided to make it a surprise.

On Friday, I gave her hints after she was convinced that the surprise was a balloon (if only I had known it would be so easy!) - "We are going somewhere!" and "Your friends will be there!".  I bought her the cutest little Anna and Elsa dress at Target, but didn't show her until we were about to leave.  At that point I also explained that we were going to see Frozen, with live characters.

She was so excited in the car, even though she didn't fully understand what we were doing.  The joy on her face once we got there is something I'll never forget.  She sat in her seat, staring at the ice in such amazement that it really made me take a step back and enjoy things through the eyes of a preschooler.  The best part was when she leaned over, cupped my face in her hands and said "Thanks for bringing me here, mommy!".  Pure bliss.

I decided to make the day all about us - mommy and daughter.  She wanted gummy bears, so I got her gummy bears.  I wanted a pretzel, so I got the pretzel.  While walking back to our seats from intermission, she saw the guy selling the ridiculously overpriced pieces of plastic Elsa wands and asked if she could have one.  I said yes.  Afterwards we went out to dinner and I didn't make her eat fruits or vegetables first.  You would think she had won the lottery!

The next day she couldn't stop talking about how she went to "Disney World" (again, if only I knew it was that easy!) or how she got to eat candy and hot dogs and not one vegetable, all while sharing her new wand with her little sister.  Although it has never happened before, and will be far and few between, our Day of Yes was exactly what we both needed.

I am so grateful for the time we spent together, I know that someday she will much more "important" things to do than to hang out with me, and although I like to think it's forever away, I know it isn't.  I wish all of you, whether you have littles or not, to just spend the day with someone that means everything to you, doing whatever comes your way.  Cherish your time together!

Although when she is grown, she might only remember "the really cool Elsa wand that lit up", I will forever remember watching her, watching Frozen on Ice.

Linking up with Emily for Grateful Heart Monday and Anne for Wednesday Wishes.

Life with a Preschooler

My oldest, "E", has always been wise beyond her years.  She spoke early, was having full conversations early, and can remember (and will repeat - we learned the hard way) anything she hears, even just once.  Her personality has always been very caring, very sweet, and very smart.  She is four now, and recently has been saying some things that just make my husband and I laugh - so I had to write them down to share with you.  I'm also linking up with Amanda for #MyConversations!

(While eating dinner)
E: How was work, Daddy?
Daddy: It was good, thanks for asking.
E: No, I mean, are you making your calls and meeting your goals ok?
(Where she even learned the concept of "making calls" and "meeting goals" is beyond me.  And yes, he is in sales, so making calls is his whole day.)

(While I'm brushing her hair)
E: (touching my stomach).  OH!  Do you have another baby in your belly, Mommy?
Me: (horrified) No, honey, I don't...
E: (laughing) Ok.  It must just be the shirt!
(This one hurt a little, but it was funny that she tried to make it better by blaming my shirt!)

(While trying something new for lunch)
E: Oh, wow!  I can't even make a yucky face when I'm trying to eat it!
(Score for me - she never tries new foods!)

(After picking her up from preschool)
Me: Honey, what did you get all over your shirt?
E: Just one of my many projects, I'm so busy.


Life with a four year old sure has it's moments, but these are the things that keep me laughing day to day.  Even when she is so serious or sassy, I know I will look back on this with a huge smile on my face.  What are some memorable things you've heard from littles?

I hope you'll be back tomorrow for Blogger Love!

When Your Phone Stops Working

This is not a "how-to" post, as I am about as good as a newborn when figuring out technology.  Although I'm pretty sure a newborn would figure things out more efficiently than I would, but I digress.

If you are friends with me on Facebook, you saw yesterday that my phone decided to take a bath with A.  I immediately took it out of the bath and dried it off, but the sound wouldn't work.  Not devastating, until I tried to make a phone call.  No sounds = no calls.  What's the point of a phone if you can't make calls?  (Never mind the fact that I rarely actually speak on my phone, but I digress again).  So, I turned to Pinterest and quickly plunked it in to a bowl of rice.

Meanwhile, I felt a little lost.  That is, until I realized how wonderful it was not having my phone around.  Seriously!  The first few hours were strange, I kept reaching for something that wasn't there.  But once I got used to it being gone, it was so nice.

I hate to admit it - but my phone gets a lot of my attention - even when my girls are around.  It's almost like an addiction.  Check email, check twitter, tweet, browse Facebook and Pinterest.  It's never-ending.  But without my phone, I was more in the moment.  I listened to my girls giggle, read books to each other, and make each other laugh.  I sat down and colored an entire picture with E.  I rolled around on the floor with A, just to make her squeal with delight.  I did these things for hours, without interruption.

I'm ashamed that I don't do this more often.  It was such a great day, pure joy even, with my girls.  It made me realize even more that time with them is short - that they will never be this small again.  I am taking this "oops" situation and running with it.  I'll be shutting down my phone every morning, while they are both awake, and just living in the moment with them.

Although I don't wish that any of you drop your phone in a pool of water, I do wish that my lesson can be learned by each of you.  It's easy to get wrapped up in technology, but enjoying each moment is much more important.  It's only fitting that I link up with Anne from Love the Here and Now today for Wednesday Wishes.

And, for the record, the rice trick does work.

The Good and Bad of Being Me

We all have qualities about ourselves that we love, and some that we don't love as much.  Getting older has proven one thing to me - I definitely know what I like and don't like about myself.

Today I'm linking up with Amanda for List Yourself.  I love this idea of a link-up - it's based on a book that Amanda read, where it gives you prompts to make lists.  The point is, at least in my opinion, is to make these lists and discover more about yourself.  Plus, tell me a blogger that doesn't love lists and I'll give you chocolate.

Today's prompt is: List all the qualities in yourself you the least - and the best.

Qualities I like the least

|| I'm sometimes judgmental.  I really try not to be, but I usually judge people based on my first impressions - good or bad.

|| I forgive easily.  This could also be a good trait, but I've been burned by a few exes because of this.  I've learned to stand my ground and make people earn my trust back.

|| I'm lazy.  I hate working out, I hate cleaning, and most days I just want to lay on the couch and watch tv.  There are exceptions to this of course - deadlines at work, playing with my girls, spending time with loved ones.  But if I'm home alone (rare) or during naptime?  Yea I'm usually not doing anything productive.

|| Going with the above, I procrastinate.  In college, I would almost always write my papers and study the day/night before.  Still true today - and my real life job revolves around deadlines.  It stresses me out!

|| I'm not always the most patient.  This is something I'm really trying to work on, especially with my girls.  Some days they just really test me, and some days I snap. :(


Qualities I like the best

|| I give good advice.  People ask my opinion on things, ranging from childrearing to fashion.  Maybe it's because I say what's on my mind, not always what they want to hear.

|| I love.  And I love deeply.  My friends and family mean the most to me, above all else.  I will go out of my way to make sure they are happy.

|| Besides the patience bit above, I'm a good mom.  I love my girls, let them have fun, but also teach them how to be good people.

|| I make people laugh.  I'm sarcastic, and you can always count on me for comic relief.

|| I'm organized.  Bills, budgets, groceries, packing - I do it all.  My attention to detail is spot on and comes in handy every day.

|| I'm a great judge of character.  My first instinct is almost always correct.


When I first started writing this prompt, I was a little nervous.  Did I really want to lay out all of my best and worst qualities for the whole internet to see?  Of course I did.  As intended, this post has made me look at myself in a new way.  And in the end, isn't that how we grow and become better people?

We're going to let my girl Kate Spade sum it all up:

 

I am wishing for more patience with my girls.  Also to finally get myself in gear and drop the laziness.  I need to work out, clean, get organized.  So much to do!

Linking up with Amanda and Anne.

Am I Doing this Right?

That's me.  A very sleep deprived me.  It was Mother's Day, 2010, and E was about 3 three weeks old.  She hadn't figured out that nights were for sleeping, and instead would cry all night and sleep all day.  Most of those nights I would woner, what am I doing wrong?  Then self doubt would enter my mind and I'd think Am I doing this right?

There is no handbook for parenting, although most days I wish there was.  It's all about choices.  Undoubtedly, each choice I make comes with a sacrifice of some sort.

I formula fed both children.  I tried with E, and after a few weeks went to the bottle.  I didn't even try with A.  Sometimes, I let the very pro-breastfeeding points of view enter my mind, and I wonder if my kids are at some sort of health or intelligence disadvantage because they were formula fed.  And I wonder, am I doing this right?

Sometimes I lose my patience.  E likes to challenge me, and most days I can handle it.  But every once in awhile I can't.  I wonder on those days if my short temper is something she will learn.  I wonder if she knows that even though I might be mad, I still love her.  And I wonder, am I doing this right?

 When A was a newborn, I let E watch movies and television.  I had to, to survive.  When we'd go to the doctor and he'd say "no more than one hour a day", I would cringe inside.  Sometimes I wonder if, during those three moths, she missed out on some good brain development time.  I still think, did I do that right?

But then, each day when the sun is setting and the girls are getting ready for bed, we cuddle.  And in that moment when A has her head tucked in to the crook of my arm, and looks up at me with her big, grey eyes, I know that I've done something right. 

Every night, when E requests that I sing her a song, we lay on her bed cuddling and singing.  As I run my fingers through her long, blond hair while her eyes get heavy, I know I've done something right.

Being a mother is hard.  Every day there is a new challenge, and every day there is something to worry about.  Something to make you wonder if you've made the right decision.  But in those quiet moments, it becomes clear to me.  My children are fed, clothed, have shelther, and most importantly, are loved.  And that reminds me that I'm doing something right.

Today I wish that mothers wouldn't be so hard on themselves.  To remember that their children are ok - that you are doing something right, even on those days when it doesn't seem like it. 

Linking up with Anne.

Where's Puppy?

Did any of you have (or maybe still have) a childhood stuffed animal that meant the world to you?  I did.  He was an elephant that my aunt made for me.  When I got him, I couldn't say "elephant" so his name became Ellie.  Ellie went everywhere with me, the entire time I lived at home, up until college.  He saw me through childhood, my parent's divorce, my sister leaving for college, boy issues and my first real love and subsequent break up.  In fact, I contemplated taking Ellie to college with me, but then decided he should stay home.  For the record, he is now in my daughter's closet, watching over her.

My daughter, E, has a similar stuffed animal.  Hers is a stuffed dalmation, named "Puppy".  (She did inherit my dog-naming skills).  Puppy is her security blanket. 

Let's set the scene of this past Saturday.  Tim was out of town for work, and E woke up with a cough she had had since Wednesday.  That morning, however, it was accompanied with a fever.  Luckily, one of my best girlfriends had stayed over the night before (we may or may not have had a lot of drinks together), so she quickly offered to stay with A while I took E to urgent care, Puppy in hand.

After a few hours, we were given a few prescriptions and the clear to go home.  E, Puppy and I loaded back in to the car and went to Target to have them filled.  After waiting for another half an hour, we finally went home.  At this point I am exhausted, feeling gross from being in urgent care all that time, and feeling bad that my friend had to stay with A for so many hours.

But, E says to me with tears in her eyes, "Mommy?  Where's Puppy?"  He was not inside the house.  He was not in the car, under the seats, next to her carseat.  He had not fallen in the driveway.  A call to Target Pharmacy told us he wasn't there.  He was gone.  The way that she looked at me seriously broke my heart.  How was I going to explain to her that he was gone?  That she should have held on to him, or not taken him with her?  She was trying to be so grown up and not completely lose it, but I could see it on her face.  She was devastated.  So I did what any mom would do... I drove back to Target.

Like a crazed woman, I looked under the car that had taken my spot.  I went to customer service and left my phone number.  I went to the pharmacy, retraced our steps through the ice cream and candy aisles (What?  We were hungry.  She did inherit my sweet tooth!).  I asked people if they had seen a stuffed dog.  (For the record, only one woman even seemed concerned.  She must have been in my situation before!)  I had given up - Puppy was gone.

Until... he wasn't.

I saw him after I had given up and was on my way out.  He was just sitting there, placed by someone who knew a child's heart would be broken for losing him.  Someone that saved my day, and E's too.

We now have a strict "Puppy stays in the house" rule, because I cannot bear to see that face of such sadness again!

Today is Wednesday Wishes with Anne.  I'm wishing that the person who found and saved Puppy knows just how much of a lifesaver he/she is.  I wish I knew who it was so I could properly thank them!

Lemons = Wine

Lately I've been dealing with a lot of "life" things.  I have been busy with work, kids, travel, life in general.  At a few points over the last couple of weeks, I found myself feeling completely overwhelmed.  That's when I start to look for the "one good thing" going on, and that's how I found this gem:

One of the things I've been dealing with is finding a new, temporary nanny.  One day, our current nanny told us she was pregnant - which was awesome, but a surprise.  The next day?  She's on bed rest, leaving us in a pinch because Tim's parents work full time, my parents are in Iowa, and we don't have a back up nanny.  (Side note - I tried to use this as another example for why we should move to Iowa, to be closer to my parents and have free daycare, but it didn't work.  Free daycare.).  We love our nanny, but have been forced to begin interviewing for a temporary and ongoing back up nanny.  So, I turned to care.com, which is how we found our first nanny.  I posted the job on Sunday and so far have had 27 responses.  Sounds great, right?  Wrong.

Of those, I only responded to four.  Only four people that I would consider interviewing and doing extensive background checks on, and then maybe consider hiring.  Of those four, two decided that they couldn't do temporary work, so I am down to two.  But first, I have some advice for those who replied and got a "Thanks, but no thanks" response.

*If you reply only with "Can I bring my three children?", don't bother responding.  First I would have to review your resume, meet you, love you, and then I would maybe consider it.

*Do not send me a paragraph that is one big run-on sentence. 

*Spell check your inquiry before hitting send!  And while you are at it, don't end every sentence with an exclamation point!!

*If your response includes notes like "There is one mark on my background check", why are you even applying to work with children?  Thanks for your honesty, but no thanks.

*I honestly got one reply that said "If you can't guarantee me $25/hr and at least 30 hours a week, I won't be a good match for you."  Well, did you read my post?  Temporary.  Part time.  Pay is negotiable, but I found it a little aggressive to say that upfront.

This week I'm wishing that this process is resolved soon.  I pray that I'm guided in the right direction.  I know that everything happens for a reason, but this is really stressing me out.  It's a hard enough decision to hire someone and trust them with your babies, but when you are sort of forced in to it, it seems worse.  I wish that we meet the perfect person, that the girls will love her, and we can move on.  And in the meantime, I wish that my Mom and friend Diane know how much they mean to me when they drop everything and drive four hours to help next week (Mom), or leave their own babies to help so I can go to work for a very important meeting (Diane). 

Linking up with Anne for Wednesday Wishes.  What are you wishing for?

Mom Confessions and A Wish

Some days, being a mother is really hard.  It seems as though my girls are either both really great - or both really cranky.  My girls definitely like to test me - and, sometimes they win.  And I'm ok with that - no one is perfect, and I'll be the first to admit that I do not have this parenting thing figured out 100%.  (But really, who does?!)

I confess....

... that sometimes, E is allowed to have a few marshmallows in the morning before breakfast.  Because, well, it keeps her quiet for at least half an hour so I can get ready.

... A will only drink water from a big girl cup, and even though it all ends up on her and the floor, I give it to her anyway.  Kids need water!

... I didnt breastfeed either child.  I tried (for a few days) with E.  It was horrible so I moved to formula.  I felt guilty for months!  When A was born, I went straight to formula and didn't feel guilty for a second.  "Breast is best", but formula made both baby and this mom happy so, win-win. 

... occassionaly E watches more tv than is suggested per day.  This was especially true last week when I wasn't feeling well.  A took a great nap, and I needed one too.  So - E watched a few episodes of Team Umizoomi while I dozed next to her.

... The only vegetable E will eat is carrots.  So she has them almost every day.

... Every once in awhile, I will put A down for a nap with her bottle.  Two shames here - giving her the bottle in bed, and giving her a bottle.  She is "supposed" to only have sippys now.  But, well, see above about those.

... I sometimes tell E that I'm going straight to bed too, so she'll go to sleep right away.  I then stay up for at least 2 more hours.

... I don't feel guilty about having time away from either of them.  Leave for the day and shop alone?  Yep.  Go to an overnight wedding and leave them with their grandparents?  Absolutely.  A girls weekend?  Sign me up.  A week-long beach vacation with one of our couple friends, sans kids?  Yes please.  Sure, I miss them.  But time without them is crucial for me - and they get quality time with their dad and grandparents too.

The last confession brings me to this - I need more patience.  I find more and more that I need to remind myself to take a deep breath and act rationally.  Two girls, ages 4 and 1.  You wouldn't believe it but the drama is already present in full force.  Some days I struggle with patience between the whining, attitude and screaming.  So, today I am wishing (and praying!) for more patience.  To calmly react to their demands, and to be able to smile instead of break down.  I am trying to remind myself that they are only this young once - and to cherish every moment, even the not so pleasant ones. I wish that on days when I am losing my patience, to remember this - and to know that someday, I'll wish they were four and one again.

Any tricks to survive the toddler/preschool years?  I'm alllll ears.

 Linking up with Anne for Wednesday Wishes.

When Peanuts Attack

One of E's favorite snacks is peanut butter crackers.  I'm pretty sure she would eat them every day, for every meal, and snacks in between if we let her.  The other day, per usual, she asked for them and I said she could have a few.  We hadn't given A nuts of any kind - not because of known allergies, or allergies in the family, but just because I wanted to make sure I was home with her when she had them for the first time, you know, just in case.

Just in case turned in to alarm after I let E share her snack with her sister. In just a few short moments, the skin around A's face became red, raised and splotchy.  She was grabbing at her face, and I panicked.  After calming myself down and telling myself to think rationally (I think this is a Mom superhero quality, as I don't really know where it came from), I checked in her mouth, listened to her breathing, and realized that her tongue was not swelling and she was breathing normally.  Thank God.

Not the best pic - 13 month olds don't sit still - ever.

I quickly gave her Benadryl (again - superhero Mom told me to do this) and called her doctor.  It was before hours so I had to wait the longest ten-ish minutes in my life.  Once she called back, we had a quick consult over the phone and we both agreed that the reaction was not life threatening.  The plan of action was to keep giving benadryl for the day, to have a blood test to figure out the severity of her allergy, and of course, keep her from eating nuts of any kind until then.

We are no stranger to food allergies.  E was allergic to strawberries from 12 months - 20 months.  Thankfully, she outgrew it.  But peanuts?  This is a whole new set of complications.  I'm terrified.  What if she doesn't outgrow this, but it in fact grows more severe?  What if she can't even be around nuts, let alone eat them?  Will I have to read every food label in search of a possible "peanut allergy" warnings?  How would I be able to send her to a friends house, a birthday party, anywhere, in fear of her coming in to contact with nuts? 

Today my wish is this: that A's allergy is so minimal there will be no long term concerns, and even better - that she outgrows it. 

Have any of you dealt with a nut allergy - either in your children or yourselves?  Words of encouragement are very welcomed!

Little Free Library - Do Some Good

Last week while Chicago thought it was Fall, the girls and I took a walk and went on a "nature hunt".  What we found was not part of nature, but so much more impressive if you ask me.

 

 

The concept is this:  "It's a "take a book, leave a book" gathering place where neighbors share their favorite literature and stories.  In its most basic form, a Little Free Library is a box full of books where anyone may stop by and pick up a book (or two) and bring back another book to share." (straight from the Little Free Library website.)

 

How fun is this idea?  People can make and decorate their own little libraries - and this concept is world wide!  I would have loved this as a child.  Going to the library was a trip that was taken multiple times a week during the summer.  My sister and I would spend hours browsing the selections, often choosing to check out the same book we had just returned the week before.  So, so many memories there.

 

This got me thinking, though.  How many children don't have the means to get to the library?  I know that a library card is free, but getting there is not.  I think this Little Free Library concept could really be beneficial in those circumstances.  And when they are placed in neighborhoods like my own, it made me look up the organization and realize that you can make donations to help those neighborhoods and bring the gift of reading books to them. 

 

Sometimes it takes something like this to remind me that my every day activities are a luxury for some people.  My wish for today is this: take the time to find something in your life that others would love to have or experience.  Then, do something to make it happen for that person.  It could be taking the ingredients for your favorite home cooked meal to your local food bank, or donating dog food to your local animal shelter.  Or, dropping off a book or two to your local Little Free Library, found on this  map.

So what will you do?  Tell me, and inspire someone else!

 

 

 

 

DIY: Artwork Photo Book

This past year was the first year of school for E.  As a preschooler, she did a lot of coloring, painting, and creating things with her hands and feet.  I loved seeing the masterpieces she created each week, but quickly got tired of having piles (and piles!) of artwork sitting around the house.  So, like any person looking for a solution, I went to Pinterest.  What I found was an app called Artkive.  Basically, you take a picture of the painting/drawing, then they will put it in a cute little book that you can order at the end of the year.  Great idea, yes?  No.  The prices were outrageous!  So, I decided to make my own with Snapfish.

I began by downloading the Snapfish app on my phone.  Then I got to work taking pictures of everything, trying to keep them in calendar order.  (This helps with the book creation).  At the end of this year, I had over 60 pictures of E's artwork!

Last month I logged on to Snapfish from my laptop - you can make a book from your phone or tablet, but I liked being able to see it larger so I could really customize it.  I chose a 8x11 Classic Photo Book with a Linen Cut-Out cover, and got to work. 

I went in order, and added the name of the months, along with other images through their huge collection of embellishments.  It was so fun picking the layout for each page, adding my photos, and embellishing her already amazing artwork.  (Every preschooler's artwork is amazing, right?)

 

 

The last page included her report card and the picture we took on her first day.  I then added some blank pages, that I added printed photos that were sent home with her throughout the year.  Pictures of her with her classmates, on field trips and with her teachers.

 My total price?  Under $30. Beat that Artkive!  (I did have a coupon for 20% off and used Ebates, but without those two things it still would have been under $40!)

I love that I started this during her first year of school and plan on making one for each year after this.  She has shown everyone that comes over and I hope that we continue to look at each masterpiece for years to come.

FYI: Snapfish had nothing to do with this post, I was not compensated in any way.  Just wanted to share the better way to save your child's artwork without the clutter!